At 2,300 pages, including a lot of fine print, the Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act recently enacted into law contains some obscure provisions that you might not have heard about. Among them are the following:<\/p>\n

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• Title I, Subtitle D, Section V, Part II, Sec. 1422<\/em> recognizes drug dealers with fewer than 50 pushers on the payroll as small businesses eligible to receive tax credits for offering health insurance to their employees.<\/li>\n
• Title II, Part III, Sec. 3028<\/em> removes the tonsorial \u201cdon\u2019t ask, don\u2019t tell\u201d clause from previous Medicare rules, enabling the establishment of Medicare \u201chair panels\u201d to identify poorly fitting toupees and to order their removal from life support.<\/li>\n
• Title II, Subtitle A, Sec. 2008<\/em> excludes from healthcare subsidies anyone who has any ancestor who ever immigrated to America\u2014legally or illegally.<\/li>\n
• Title II, Part V, Sec. 1564<\/em> requires all physicians, hospitals and other healthcare providers to use Facebook as the exclusive platform for electronic medical records and communication with patients.<\/li>\n
• Title II, Subtitle A, Part I, Sec. 3009<\/em> requires all health-industry executives and lobbyists to wear funny hats and clown shoes when visiting Congressional offices or testifying before Congressional committees.<\/li>\n
• Title V, Subtitle C, Sec. 4208<\/em> mandates the inclusion of \u201csocialism anxiety\u201d and \u201csocialism phobia\u201d as recognized, delusional psychiatric disorders in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders<\/em> (DSM<\/em>).<\/li>\n
• Title II, Subtitle D, Sec. 2305<\/em> provides funding for government sponsored sexual-health clinics. This section is known as the pubic option.<\/li>\n
• Title IX, Subtitle A, Sec. 9018<\/a><\/em>creates a government takeover of the United States government.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n

  Who knew? And when did they know it?<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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