Claiming that his primary campaign funder has been too miserly, and has withheld too much of his net worth of $10 billion, plaintiff Trump is suing himself for an additional $40 million dollars he says he promised himself when he launched his campaign. Defendant Trump says he never said that.<\/p>\n

Trump v Soleil<\/em>:<\/h3>\n

Seeking $20 million in damages, Trump is accusing his tanning spa for using a faulty array of ultra-violet lights in his tanning bed, resulting in a skin color that does not occur in nature, [too close in hue, he adds, to that of John Boehner] and creating a vast white, raccoon-like area around his eyes.<\/p>\n

Trump v Vagina: <\/em><\/h3>\n

In this suit filed in domestic court, Trump asserts that women\u2014who he loves, and who love him, by the way, okay?\u2014are hurting his reputation: their petty need to be treated with dignity, and their demands for reproductive rights have driven him crazy and forced him to lash out and make misogynistic statements. He is suing the entire female gender for libel and is demanding that all women\u2014not just those who have abortions\u2014be subjected to \u201csome kind of punishment.\u201d<\/p>\n

Trump v Clinton\/Sanders:\u00a0 <\/em><\/h3>\n

Although Trump does not ask for specific financial compensation in this suit, he is suing Hillary Clinton and Bernie Sanders for being smarter, more informed, and more coherent speakers than him, thus making him look like an idiot by comparison. Trump has determined that he cannot successfully make this claim against his Republican opponents.<\/p>\n

Trump v Cooper<\/em>:<\/h3>\n

After CNN\u2019s Anderson Cooper characterized Trump\u2019s answer to a question as \u201ca 5-year-old\u2019s response,\u201d Trump filed a lawsuit whose text said, in its entirety: \u201cI know you are, but what am I? Nanny nanny boo boo. I\u2019m telling Mom. And anyway, he started it.\u201d<\/p>\n

Res ipse dixit.<\/em><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Donald Trump has repeatedly threatened to sue people and organizations that he believes have treated him unfairly. Today–April 1, 2016– he is making good<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[2119,476],"tags":[963,2459,2501],"yoast_head":"\n